Sunday, July 17, 2005

When Stupid People Go Shopping, Part 2

Scene: same grocery store as before. Long line of customers, complete with screaming toddlers in SUV-sized strollers exactly as wide as the aisle and the neighborhood OCD monster, who starts at the front and asks each successive person on his way back, "Excuse me, are you on line?" I am sorely tempted to say, "No, I am IN line."

I am, again, the next person. A lady with a thick Russian accent is making a very large purchase, including many varieties of produce for which the trainee cashier does not know the price. Finally a total is announced.

Cashier: $71.69.

The woman hands over a plastic card.

Cashier: Credit or debit?

Woman: Eh?

Cashier: CRED-IT OR DEB-IT?

Woman: Ah, da, da, krrray-deet.

The credit machine makes a scary beeping noise.

Cashier: This card's no good.

Woman: Eh?

Cashier: YOUR...CARD...DON'T...WORK.

Woman: Eh, no, eet works, works. I use. Shoppingk.

Cashier: Okay, well, um, it's not working now.

Woman: No no, works. Try 'gain, plyizz.

Credit machine: beeeeeep

Cashier: Tony, her card don't work.

Manager: Let me see. (swipes)

Credit machine: beeeeeep

Manager: Wait, this is a frequent flier card.

5 comments:

Jess said...

Oy vey

Richie said...

Hello Andy,

Long time since I last commented on your blog. I wanted to say that I would like you to comment, if at all possible, on Mayor West's (Spokane WA) outing and his continued work against gay rights. What a double standard eh!

Hugs,
Richie

Matthew said...

What a hillarious car swap moment. Clearly, this lady is not quite understanding the concept. Having dealt with the traumas of shopping in a foreign language, I'm prevented from getting truly annoyed with her. More like resignation. I hope she actually had the credit card with her... How much longer did it take for her to check out?

Andy said...

I, too, have had foreign-shopping crises, so I am empathetic. But I have to say, I think this lady was trying to pull one over on the grocery store. I don't think she was very bright, and I think she knew what she was doing, but that somewhere in that little головной мозг of hers she thought they would be fooled into believing this was a credit card. The first time the cashier tried to tell her it didn't work, she was rather aggressively defensive about it...it just seemed scripted to me. But anyway, she gave up and gave them a real credit card.

bohica said...

LOL it is nice to know that grocery lines are a problem everywhere, not just down here in the Bible belt.