Tuesday, November 09, 2004

Groundhog Day, Redux

No, I didn't talk to him today either.

Shut up.

But I did make eye contact -- twice!! -- and even got something that looked like it might have been a smile. (I guess we're shy. I'm having a vision of us 50 years from now sitting on opposite ends of the room of our homos-only retirement center in Ft. Lauderdale, still trying to get up the nerve to say "Hi.")

No crazy people on the subway today, so it was a nice quiet ride. I almost got to sit next to Mystery Boy, but I was a split-second too slow. I thought if I lunged for the seat next to him it just wouldn't be subtle enough. (Why do I get the feeling I'm going to be a very subtle single senior citizen?) Well, it's clearly not my fault. Some straight person stole my seat. There you go again.

I guess summer is officially over. It was 37 degrees this morning. Brrr. There is another subway phenomenon that you people probably never think about, but in cold weather New Yorkers swell up to three times their normal size. Coats, scarves, hats, bags. We're like multi-racial pastries made from Gore-Tex. I much prefer coatless summer. Of course we still have to get the same number of people on the train as we do when we're just in our shirtsleeves.

In other news, Michael Phelps is a dumbass.

1 comment:

Andy said...

Yes, they sure do. They are so ugly. The ghetto kids, especially, always wear the EXACT SAME oversized black parka. They look like tires with legs and do-rags.